Assuming Self-Confidence

Like millions of girls and women around the world, self confidence has been a real issue for your girl.

This literally is the hardest blog post I have ever done but I feel as though it’s necessary … I know for a fact at least one girl will take something positive away from this.

One thing I think is very important to note is that children,

little boys and girls are HIGHLY impressionable.

So I urge you guys if you have younger sisters and brothers, please encourage them.. tell your little sister she’s beautiful , tell your little brother he’s cool over and over until they believe it with every ounce of their being.

Trust me it is extremely necessary.

Depending on your environment  your school , or your neighborhood you learn as you go. You learn and pick up things that if not clarified or explained you stick on to.

For example, when I was about 8 or 9 I was teased extremely bad for my eye shape. Something that I admire about my self  today I used to HATE! I was called “fake China”, people squinted there eyes when speaking about me and all the horrible things children do to each other. I remember asking my parents if I was adopted because I literally was the only one in my family who possessed this trait.

I remember looking in family albums to see if I had a long lost aunt or uncle who looked like me.  And I found none.

What I did as I got older was wear glasses to sort of create a barrier between me and people. I developed really bad anxiety and used anything I could to create a barrier between me and people. Whether it be something physical or it be the way I treated people, I was overly defensive ready to fight and just a hot mess!

I was extremely fragile when it came to my appearance and it showed. I was very easily insulted. I took everything people said or didn’t say personal.

I spent years like this. And as you grow older you learn a few things and you gain a few more insecurities.

Unfortunately, I gained a little more than a few more insecurities.  I spiraled through a bunch of hot messes. I was dealing with an intense culture clash with my parents , I developed an eating disorder, and was dealing with a lot of anxiety issues.

Imagine the dip my self confidence had… tremendous. I literally had 0% self confidence.

This is the reason why I care so much about how women and girls perceive themselves.  I have dealt and understand first hand the effect it can have on not just how you feel but your mentality.

Too many of us are born to parents who find it hard or rather unnecessary to teach or facilitate “Self confidence”. In the end we have a bunch of grown women with issues that stem from when they were young girls.

With age you realized self-satisfaction is one of the most important things. Literally 100 people can call you smart or beautiful, but if deep down inside you don’t think your smart or beautiful you don’t believe it.

And how do you get to a place of comfort if this is how you lead your life?

The answer is you don’t. It goes from bad to worse. Before you know it those insecurities are the driving force behind some of the decisions you make in life, which is never good.

Surround yourself with people who love and support you. Be around people who appreciate your strengths and celebrate them

One thing I have learned about is affirmations, you remind yourself that you are talented, you are smart, you are beautiful or whatever the case may be.

Do the things that genuinely help you feel confident. I know for me if I haven’t been to the gym in a week i start to feel extremely self-conscious.  So engage yourself in things that pull out the best in you or encourage positive vibes. !


Ultimately you have to take care of yourself it’s just as simple as that !

-Kissy ❤


3 Comments Add yours

  1. Fca_ak ✅ says:

    I love this. I’m currently reading a book the title of it is the 7 habits of highly effective people by Stephane R. Covey I recommend everyone to get their hand on that book. But on the book the first few pages it talk about how people complain and feel self confidence at a low level. People have deep problems, painful problems problems that quick fix approach can’t solve.

    Two couples where trying to protect and save their son from the problems he was going thru and getting laughed at etc… they tried everything positive to push him to do better and nothing was working. They were so into helping and and worried about him they realized that what they were doing to help their son was not in harmony with the way they have seen him. They realized that their perception was that he was behind.

    You can’t stop a quitter from quitting. You can’t stop a winner from winning. If we wanna change the situation we have to change ourselves And to change ourselves effectively, we have to change our perception. And I love this keep it up kissy!!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Fca_ak says:

        Not a problem


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